“A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.”

~Lana Turner

“Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.”

~Margaret Mead

“I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.”

~Ron White

“I knew I matured when I realized every situation doesn’t need a reaction. Sometimes you just have to leave people to continue to do the lame shit that they do.”

~Unknown

“Wise men speak because they have something to say; fools because they have to say something.”

~Plato

“Trying to define yourself is like trying to bite your own teeth.”

~Alan W. Watts

“Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of Congress; but I repeat myself.”

~Mark Twain

“The more people I meet, the less I want to leave the house.”

~Unknown

“No matter how serious life gets you still gotta have that one person you can be completely stupid with.”

~Unknown

“Love is the magician that pulls man out of his own hat.”

~Ben Hecht

“Bring ideas in and entertain them royally, for one of them may be the king.”

~Mark Van Doren

“Sometimes you gotta play the role of a fool to fool the fool who THINKS they are fooling you.”

~Unknown

“Dear karma, I have a list of people that you missed.”

~Unknown

“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”

~Albert Einstein

“Tact is the ability to tell someone to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip.”

~Winston S. Churchill

“Don't worry about what I'm doing, worry about why you're worried about what I'm doing.”

~Unknown

“We have forty million reasons for failure, but not a single excuse.”

~Rudyard Kipling

“I am always doing that which I cannot do, in order that I may learn how to do it.”

~Pablo Picasso

“They told me that to make her fall in love; I had to make her laugh. But every time she laughs, I’m the one who falls in love.”

~Tommaso Ferraris

“Trying to be happy by accumulating possessions is like trying to satisfy hunger by taping sandwiches all over your body.”

~George Carlin

“Negative people don't want solutions. Solutions mean they have to work to find something else to be negative about!”

~Tom Ziglar

“There are over 7 BILLION PEOPLE on earth and you’re going to let 1 PERSON ruin your day? DON’T.”

~Unknown

“I don't care what you think about me. I don't think about you at all.”

~Coco Chanel

“Happiness is finding someone as weird as yourself.”

~Unknown